the only aisle i’ll be walking down is the alcohol section of my local grocery store
she’s beauty and she’s grace, she dropped her phone on her face
Sometimes I miss you so hard I feel like my teeth might crack and fall out, or like I might never enjoy the taste of avocado again. But, most of the time I do okay and the thought of you doesn’t make me so dreary or guilty anymore, instead just kind of like I do when my alarm goes off in the morning and I’m not ready to get up. Do Red Pandas still make you laugh? Do you still drive your old Honda and eat every meal like you live in a refugee camp? I don’t think I’ll ever touch another pecan pie and I’ll definitely never ride your new motorcycle, but I’ll always love you for wading into my life and forever changing the way these muddy waters flow. Because we can’t be defined by those nevers, only the always. I think about everything you taught me and the way our bodies made perfect spoons for one another, how you helped me through all those winters and I hope maybe I left you something like that. Maybe when your heel strikes the pavement too hard during a run or when you fly in a plane or see a succulent plant you think of how my hair used to get stuck in your nose while we slept or how I couldn’t eat without frowning, but I always made you feel smart and strong. Maybe even though I’m not there to make you feel that or anything at all anymore, at least now you know it can be done. Our secrets are our own secrets again, but we will be happy again.
- If you like someone, wait.
- Give lots of compliments, even if you’re shy. Everyone else is too.
- Change. Get a haircut, try new perfume, get new sheets. Become better than you were before.
- Eat healthier. Learn to cook something fancy.
- Get up earlier and watch the sun come up.
- Wear soft clothes, take a bath, drink something warm.
- Meet someone new, even just a friend.
- Become closer with your friends and your family. Call your mother. Cry with your best friend. Tell everyone how much you appreciate them.
- Keep your room clean. Buy some candles. Let the natural light in.
- Make a list of reasons why you’ll be better off without them. Believe they are true, because they are.
- Listen to new music.
- Write everything you’re thinking and feeling. Write letters. Write happy letters, sad letters, and angry letters, even if you’re never going to send them.
- It’s okay to be sad, but not forever. Sadness is not as beautiful as music makes it seem. Lack of sleep makes your eyes droopy, not deep. Wake up every morning and tell yourself you’re going to have a good day.
- Go to the library. Don’t forget to look in the music section.
- Remove them from your life. Get rid of the things they gave you if they make you sad. They’re not worth it. You will never be happy if you continue to hold on to the things that make you sad.
- Make new memories.
- Try to find something to appreciate in everything you do or experience.
- Being alone is okay, you don’t have to surround yourself with people.
- Become your own best friend. Buy yourself coffee and drink it alone in a cafe. Take your time.
- Learn to love every bit of yourself.